Squirk's Overseas Experience

The tales of one Kiwi returning to Mother Britain and exploring the Big Wide World... without being eaten by a shark.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

A home among the gum trees

I've placed a flat wanted advert on the most-recommended classified site in London, The Gumtree. I had to post it a few times before it was accepted — I think their site could do with a little love and caring behind the scenes.

I started writing a serious ad but then I came across Joe Richards' advert and realised I needed a competitive edge.

Thinking back to when we tried to raise a flat from 785's ashes (and completely not learning from what happened there), I put the following together:

I'm looking for a flat, but simply a room and facilities is not enough for me.

Actually, I've already kidnapped your puppy and/or parents and will hold them hostage until I have a suitable home.

Here are my demands:
  • Double room
  • Furnished (with double bed)
  • Zone 1 or Zone 2
  • Less than 30 minutes from Tottenham Court Road station by public transport (they have my favourite burgers)
  • Reasonably social flatmates (2 to 5 of them)
I am willing to pay around 100 GBP per week for this. If your flat is right next to the Red Veg burger bar in Soho, I will pay much more and also have your babies.


The theory is that only sufficiently awesome people would respond to an ad like that. Maybe I should put up a normal one as well?

Afterwards, I noticed an ad for a kissing group in the community section. Some sort of entry-level swinger's group, perhaps?

Update: Fixed some formatting on the ad


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